Homeopathy Tips for 10/30/12 Acceptance and Healing

Somewhere along the line of our human development we learned to always try to do our best. Many times this is translated to “we need to do better.” In many cases as a person is healing they go through a phase of seeing their dis-ease as never before: as if finally the clouds parted and they can now see the sun.

As this occurs I often call this process “moving into the observer”. I have written about this in past newsletters. But in the course of healing I see another common pattern of thinking that people go through.  As they become more consciously aware of their dis-ease they often go into self-reproach.

We all have learned and probably taught our own children through discipline. When the toddler runs into the street for the umpteenth time after being told not to do that eventually a little smack may come. After repeated attempts by the parents to discourage the behavior the child learns (eventually) that disciple works. We often don’t see evidence of this until the child grows up and becomes much more responsible but the little smacks we have received along the way develop into a pattern of thinking we utilize to always do a little better.

Now here comes the problem in healing. When the person finally realizes the errors of their ways I often see them go into self-reproach. They will say they should have done differently and that only if they could change the story of their life now. Well, we are not time travelers and can not go back to change anything. We do have a new freedom to choose though as we move into health.

When the client goes in to self-reproach I always remind them that they have done the best they could have or they wouldn’t have done it the way they did. Almost all  of the “errors” we make are a result of survival and they usually serve us well. This is why we adopt them because the end result was, we survived. It is when we have the patterns in our life that no longer serve us that we wish we would have done it differently. But if we could have made a different choice, we would have. There is no arguing with the past.

The way out of the dilemma of self-reproach about our past is through acceptance and love. Guilt will only serve us for a very short time. It will eventually incapacitate us if we hold it for very long. It serves us well to make restitution with others but is like a battering ram to ourselves. The choices we make always serve us to our highest most. There is not one person on this planet that is not doing the very best that they can. If they could do better, they would do better.

So when the self-reproach and regrets come I explain this process to my clients. It lets them “off the hook” so to speak. They all do a good job of keeping themselves “on the hook” but they must come to acceptance as they continue to heal, or the healing will not be complete. They can now forgive themselves.

Really the path back to our joy is through acceptance and love. Love of self  is first and foremost. Most people have never heard of this concept and when reminded really appreciate that finally they can be forgiven. Now they can forgive themselves for all of the choices they made along the way. Now they can be in acceptance about their past and move forward with more freedom. I encourage them to name it, claim it and then drop it. Our past can be like baggage that we can drag around for lifetimes.

True healing brings acceptance and liberation. When our patterns of self-discipline come into play we can really confuse ourselves by more self-condemnation. Healing is freedom. Freedom to be all we can be. If we become our own worst enemies, then we will not be free. Healing is through acceptance and love. Forgiveness is an inside job. Share this with your clients and you will be helping them tremendously. They may never have heard of such a concept.

6 comments so far

  1. Lucinda on

    There’s a great book on this topic called “There Is Nothing Wrong With You” by Cheri Huber

    • Carol Nelson on

      The Emotional Freedom Technique, or tapping, begins with, “Even though I (fill in the blank), I deeply and completely accept myself.” Such an important healing thought in all modalities.

      • Robert Field on

        Hi Carol, Yes tapping is a good way through this. Here is the link for a previous article I have written about tapping. You can find it in the list to the right. Enjoy.

        Homeopathy Tips for 11/30/10 Emotional Freedom Technique

        Robert Field

  2. Dr.Abdul Mannan Howlader on

    I have gone through the article and found it very much important for the people who profess the philosophy of Homeopathy.

  3. Philip Joseph on

    Dear Dr Robert: As you wrote so insightfully, Self-awareness, reproach, guilt feelings etc are often seen in the Healing process. But I have also wondered why we practioners don’t offer help to ease this transition……from “awareness to guilt to acceptance to moving on” by using acute remedies. I feel that both Homeopathic remedies & Bach remedies will naturally allow the transition to happen gently and safely. Example – the rubric ‘antagonism with self’ yields a couple of remedies in the repertory. Likewise many of the Bach remedies offer a safe alternative to verbal counselling (or could be an adjunct to support and counselling). Example – “Honeysuckle: Helps you let go of past experiences or events. Your thoughts are in the past rather in the present.”……………………..Also, Chestnut Bud: Helps when you keep doing the same mistake over and over again. ………………………….I consider the situation of a person going thru the acceptance process as an acute situation where the body and spirit will benefit from support – whether the support came from verbal counselling or from taking an acute remedy aka Bach remedies or Homeopathic remedies. The Bach remedies are especially fast acting and beneficial for the above conditions in my humble limited experience. If a client has a certain constitutional remedy or state and suddenly he suffers a business loss or family calamity and he becomes suicidial…then I look towards the remedies under the rubric of ‘death, desires, mind’ to take care of the acute situation that has risen. Likewise, I feel that the guilt, reproach, acceptance cycle can be speeded up by treating this as an acute situation and choosing a remedy accordingly…..Thank you for your service to homeopathic community…….Philip


    very nice

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